Deadpan Gifts

Your Knob Still Does The Job Happy Anniversary Greeting Card | Funny, Deadpan Anniversary Card For Husband, Boyfriend, Penis Still Works, Dick Joke

Your Knob Still Does The Job Happy Anniversary Greeting Card

from £3.99

Put a smile on their face with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Good Luck! You're Quite Thick So Don't Get Your Hopes Up! Greeting Card | Rude, Deadpan Good Luck Card, Dunce Cap Illustration, Stupid, Exams

Good Luck! You're Quite Thick So Don't Get Your Hopes Up! Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Nope, Still An Old Fart! Greeting Card | Rude, Offensive, Deadpan Card For Parent, Grandparent, Zimmer Frame, Walking Aid Illustration, Old Age

Nope, Still An Old Fart! Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Nope, Still A Wanker! Greeting Card | Rude, Offensive, Deadpan Card For Friend, Brother, Sister, Sibling, Wanker, Monochrome

Nope, Still A Wanker! Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
One Day All Trace Of You Will Be Forgotten. Let's Do Something Stupid! Greeting Card | Deadpan Card For Friend, Reckless, Live For Today

One Day All Trace Of You Will Be Forgotten. Let's Do Something Stupid! Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
I'm Starting To Realise That Looking Up To You Might Have Been A Mistake... Happy Birthday Mum! Greeting Card | Deadpan Birthday Card For Mother
from £3.99
I'm Starting To Realise That Looking Up To You Might Have Been A Mistake... Happy Birthday Bro! Greeting Card | Deadpan Birthday Card For Brother
from £3.99
I'm Starting To Realise That Looking Up To You Might Have Been A Mistake... Happy Birthday Sis! Greeting Card | Deadpan Birthday Card For Sister
from £3.99
At Least Your Age Is Starting To Catch Up With Your Face. Happy Birthday! Greeting Card | Deadpan Birthday Card For Parent, Old Age Joke

At Least Your Age Is Starting To Catch Up With Your Face. Happy Birthday! Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
I Have Lost All Respect For You. Happy Birthday! Greeting Card | Deadpan, Rude Birthday Card, Lost Respect For Friend, For Partner, For Spouse

I Have Lost All Respect For You. Happy Birthday! Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
I Hate What We Have Become. Happy Anniversary! Greeting Card | Deadpan Anniversary Card, For Husband, For Wife, For Girlfriend, For Boyfriend

I Hate What We Have Become. Happy Anniversary! Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
It Is Now No Longer Financially Viable For Us To Break Up. Happy Anniversary! Greeting Card | Deadpan Anniversary Card, For Husband, For Wife

It Is Now No Longer Financially Viable For Us To Break Up. Happy Anniversary! Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Dad, Thanks For All The Free Food Greeting Card | Deadpan Father's Day Card, Funny Thank You Card For Dad, For Him

Dad, Thanks For All The Free Food Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Dad, Thanks For Wiping My Bum Greeting Card | Deadpan Father's Day Card, Funny Thank You Card For Dad, For Him, Nappy Change Joke

Dad, Thanks For Wiping My Bum Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Dad, Thanks For Being My Taxi Greeting Card | Deadpan Father's Day Card, Funny Thank You Card For Dad, For Him

Dad, Thanks For Being My Taxi Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Jingle Bell... End. Mug | Rude Christmas Gift, Stocking Filler, Deadpan, Funny Christmas Carol Pun Coffee Mug, Jingle Bells, Bellend, Profanity

Jingle Bell... End. Mug

£11.95

Tell them like it is with our fun range of mugs.

£11.95
Don't Get Any Ideas You're Getting A Handjob At Best. Happy Valentine's. Greeting Card | Deadpan, Rude Valentine's Card In Red For Him, Husband, Boyfriend

Don't Get Any Ideas You're Getting A Handjob At Best. Happy Valentine's. Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
I Have Lost All Respect For You. HB. Greeting Card | Deadpan, Dry Humour Birthday Card In Orange For Husband, Wife, Lost Respect

I Have Lost All Respect For You. HB. Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards.

from £3.99
The Earth Is Dying And So Are You Mug | Deadpan, Dry Humour, Rude Old Age Joke Birthday Gift, Mug

The Earth Is Dying And So Are You Mug

£11.95

Tell them like it is with our fun range of mugs.

£11.95
Together We Can Destroy Christmas Greeting Card | Deadpan Christmas Card For Friends, Bah Humbug, Christmas Haters

Together We Can Destroy Christmas Greeting Card

from £3.99

Put a smile on their face with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Your Constant Joy Is Starting To Encroach On My Abject Misery Greeting Card | Deadpan, Pessimistic Congratulations Card, Engagement, New Job, Jealousy

Your Constant Joy Is Starting To Encroach On My Abject Misery Greeting Card

from £3.99

Put a smile on their face with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
The Earth Is Dying And So Are You Greeting Card | Deadpan, Dry Humour, Rude Old Age Joke Birthday Card For Grandparent, Mum, Dad

The Earth Is Dying And So Are You Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Let That Shit Go. Tote | Canvas Shopping Bag, Yoga Joke Tote Bag, For Yoga, Yogi, Namaste, Profanity, Let It Go, Breakup, Zen, Forgiveness, Healing

Let That Shit Go. Tote

£26.50

Hit the beach or the shops with our range of fun canvas tote bags. SIZE: 14" x 18.5"

£26.50
You're My Type On Paper. Mug | Deadpan Valentine's Gift In Red For Him, Her, Crush, Love, Be My Valentine

You're My Type On Paper. Mug

£11.95

Tell them like it is with our fun range of mugs.

£11.95
You're My Type On Paper. Greeting Card | Deadpan Valentine's Card In Red For Him, Her, Crush, Love, Be My Valentine

You're My Type On Paper. Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Jingle Balls. Mug | Rude Christmas Gift, Stocking Filler, Deadpan, Funny Christmas Carol Pun Coffee Mug, Jingle Bells

Jingle Balls. Mug

£11.95

Tell them like it is with our fun range of mugs.

£11.95
Eat Sleep Yoga Repeat Tote | Canvas Shopping Bag, Yoga Joke Tote Bag, For Yoga, Yogi, Deadpan, Namaste

Eat Sleep Yoga Repeat Tote

£26.50

Hit the beach or the shops with our range of fun canvas tote bags. SIZE: 14" x 18.5"

£26.50
Happy Father's Day From Your Greatest Accomplishment. Greeting Card | Funny, Deadpan, Joke Father's Day Card For Dad, Him

Happy Father's Day From Your Greatest Accomplishment. Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Fuck You're Old. Greeting Card | Offensive, Rude, Funny, Deadpan, Profanity Birthday Card, Age Joke

Fuck You're Old. Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Your Thirties Have Now Expired. Greeting Card | Colourful, Blunt 40th, Deadpan Fortieth Birthday Card For Forty Year Old, Brother, Sister, Friend

Your Thirties Have Now Expired. Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
RIP To Your Fifties Greeting Card | Deadpan, Dry Humour Sixtieth Birthday Card For Grandparent, Mum, Dad, Sixty Year Old, 60th

RIP To Your Fifties Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
You're My Weirdo. Greeting Card | Funny Pink Anniversary Card For Girlfriend, Boyfriend, Husband, Wife, Silly Love Card, Valentines

You're My Weirdo. Greeting Card

from £3.99

Put a smile on their face with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Obligatory Father's Day Card. Greeting Card | Deadpan, Dry Humour, Blue Card For Dad, Father

Obligatory Father's Day Card. Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Good Luck And Good Riddance. Greeting Card | Deadpan, Rude, Funny Good Luck Card, New Job, You're Leaving, Retirement, New Home

Good Luck And Good Riddance. Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Happy Father's Day From Your Greatest Accomplishment Greeting Card | Deadpan, Funny, Joke Fathers Day Card For Dad, Him

Happy Father's Day From Your Greatest Accomplishment Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Dad, Thanks For Supporting All My Bad Decisions Greeting Card | Deadpan, Funny, Joke Fathers Day Card For Dad, Him, Thank You Card

Dad, Thanks For Supporting All My Bad Decisions Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Mum, Thanks For Supporting All My Bad Decisions Greeting Card | Deadpan, Funny, Joke Mothers Day Card For Mum, Her, Thank You Card

Mum, Thanks For Supporting All My Bad Decisions Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
I Only Married You For Your Money Greeting Card | Funny, Offensive Valentines Card, Wedding Anniversary, Love, Golddigger Joke

I Only Married You For Your Money Greeting Card

from £3.99

Put a smile on their face with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Running Wanker A5 Notebook | Rude, Funny Gift For Runner, Marathon Journal, Diary, 5k, Jogger, Jogging

Running Wanker A5 Notebook

£11.25

Tell them like it is with these fun notebooks.

£11.25
Beached Whale Beach Towel | Funny, Rude Pop Art Beach Towel, Whale Joke, Blue, Yellow

Beached Whale Beach Towel

£35.95

Have fun in the sun with our range of printed beach towels.  SIZE:  80cm X 160cm

£35.95
Ghoul Power Tote | Funny Trick Or Treat Bag, Girl Power Pun Halloween Tote, Ghost, Ghoulies

#ghoulpower Tote

£26.50

Hit the beach or the shops with our range of fun canvas tote bags. SIZE: 14" x 18.5"

£26.50
Hi I'm Vegan Tote | Canvas Vegan Shopping Bag, Beach Bag, Veggie, Plant Based, Monochrome

Hi I'm Vegan Tote

£26.50

Hit the beach or the shops with our range of fun canvas tote bags. SIZE: 14" x 18.5"

£26.50
If You Jingle My Bell I'll Give You A White Christmas Apron | Rude, Funny, Red Christmas Apron, Christmas Carol Inuendo

If You Jingle My Bell I'll Give You A White Christmas Apron

£21.50

Tell them like it is with our range of canvas aprons.  SIZE: 25" X 35" 

£21.50
Welcome To The World Wrinkly Alien Greeting Card | Funny New Baby Card, Joke New Baby Card, Tiny Human, Alien Joke

Welcome To The World Wrinkly Alien Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Knights Hemplar Greeting Card | Weed Birthday Card, Funny Gift For Weed Smoker, Stoner, Knights Templar Pun, Cannabis, Marijuana, Hash, Ganja, Pot

Knights Hemplar Greeting Card

from £3.99

Put a smile on their face with our range of pun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Your Life Is Officially Over Greeting Card | Funny New Baby Card, Joke New Parents Card, Rude Just Married Card

Your Life Is Officially Over Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Keep The Fuck Away A5 Notebook | Funny Offensive Gifts For Friends, Monochrome, Profanity, Stay Away, Get Well Soon

Keep The Fuck Away A5 Notebook

£11.25

Tell them like it is with these fun notebooks.

£11.25
Keep The Fuck Away Sticker | Funny Offensive Gifts For Friends, Monochrome, Profanity, Stay Away, Get Well Soon

Keep The Fuck Away Sticker

£3.65

Tell them like it is with these fun stickers.  SIZE: 3x4"

£3.65

We challenge you to gift these items without cracking a smile. Lemon Loco offers a wide range of deadpan gifts, ranging from Mugs, Coasters, Magnets, Stickers, Notebooks, Cushions, Journals, Towels, Tote Bags & Aprons.

We also offer a collection of premium deadpan greeting cards which can be personalised and sent direct at no extra cost. Browse now to find your perfect gift today!