Deadpan Gifts

I Wish You Had Moved Further Away Greeting Card | Deadpan New Home Card, Funny Moving House Card, Too Close

I Wish You Had Moved Further Away Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
After A Year Of Lockdowns And Social Distancing, I Can Safely Say It's Been A Blessing Not Having To See You Greeting Card | Deadpan Greeting Card, Stay Away
from £3.99
Looking 60 Years Old Is Great... If You're 70 Greeting Card | Deadpan Birthday Card For Grandparent, Parent, Friend, Sibling, Getting Old, Old Age Joke

Looking 60 Years Old Is Great... If You're 70 Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Merry Christmas. Now Let's Eat Until We Hate Ourselves! Greeting Card | Deadpan Christmas Card, Monochrome, Overeating At Christmas Joke

Merry Christmas. Now Let's Eat Until We Hate Ourselves! Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Nope, Still A Ginger Twat! Greeting Card | Rude, Deadpan Card For Ginger Person, Red Head, Friend, Sibling, Man With Ginger Hair Illustration

Nope, Still A Ginger Twat! Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
You Stopped Satisfying Me Years Ago. Happy Valentine's. Greeting Card | Deadpan, Rude Valentine's Card In Red For Him, Her, Husband, Wife

You Stopped Satisfying Me Years Ago. Happy Valentine's. Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
At Least You Can Say Christmas Made You Fat Greeting Card | Deadpan Christmas Card For Friends, Christmas Food Joke

At Least You Can Say Christmas Made You Fat Greeting Card

from £3.99

Put a smile on their face with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Happy Birthday To My Favourite Lesbian Greeting Card | Deadpan, LGBTQ+ Birthday Card For Friend

Happy Birthday To My Favourite Lesbian Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Happy Birthday From Your Favourite Bisexual Greeting Card | Deadpan, LGBTQ+ Birthday Card For Friend

Happy Birthday From Your Favourite Bisexual Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Happy Birthday From Your Favourite Gay Greeting Card | Deadpan, LGBTQ+ Birthday Card For Friend

Happy Birthday From Your Favourite Gay Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Happy Birthday From Your Favourite Lesbian Greeting Card | Deadpan, LGBTQ+ Birthday Card For Friend

Happy Birthday From Your Favourite Lesbian Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Your Fifties Have Now Expired. Greeting Card | Colourful, Blunt 60th, Deadpan Sixtieth Birthday Card For Sixty Year Old, Grandma, Grandad, Mum, Dad

Your Fifties Have Now Expired. Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Your Forties Have Now Expired. Greeting Card | Colourful, Blunt 50th, Deadpan Fiftieth Birthday Card For Fifty Year Old, Brother, Sister, Mum, Dad, Friend

Your Forties Have Now Expired. Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Your Twenties Have Now Expired. Greeting Card | Colourful, Blunt 30th, Deadpan Thirtieth Birthday Card For Thirty Year Old, Brother, Sister, Friend, Son, Daughter

Your Twenties Have Now Expired. Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
RIP To Your Thirties Greeting Card | Deadpan, Dry Humour Fortieth Birthday Card For Son, Daughter, Brother, Sister, Friend, Forty Year Old, 40th

RIP To Your Thirties Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Obligatory Mother's Day Card.  Greeting Card | Deadpan, Dry Humour, Pink Card For Mum, Mother

Obligatory Mother's Day Card. Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Here's To Another Shitty Year Ahead. Greeting Card | Pessimistic, Deadpan, Funny Happy New Year Card, Profanity

Here's To Another Shitty Year Ahead. Greeting Card

from £3.99

Put a smile on their face with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Good Luck You Fuck. Greeting Card | Deadpan, Rude, Profanity Funny Good Luck Card, New Job, You're Leaving, Retirement

Good Luck You Fuck. Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
You're Getting Married. Shit Just Got Real. Greeting Card | Rude, Funny, Profanity Wedding Card, Engagement

You're Getting Married. Shit Just Got Real. Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Happy Mother's Day From Your Greatest Accomplishment Greeting Card | Deadpan, Funny, Joke Mothers Day Card For Mum, Her

Happy Mother's Day From Your Greatest Accomplishment Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
You're My Weirdo Greeting Card | Funny, Silly, Valentines Card For Boyfriend, Girlfriend, Husband, Wife, Anniversary, Love

You're My Weirdo Greeting Card

from £3.99

Put a smile on their face with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Even Your Dog Thinks You're A Dick Mug | Rude, Funny, Profanity Gift For Dog Owner, Dog Lover, Puppies

Even Your Dog Thinks You're A Dick Mug

£11.95

Tell them like it is with our fun range of mugs.

£11.95
Carole Fuckin' Baskin Mug | Funny Gift For Tiger King Fan, Funny, Tiger King, Carole Baskin Birthday Gift

Carole Fuckin' Baskin Mug

£11.95

Tell them like it is with our fun range of mugs.

£11.95
Witch Please Tote | Funny Trick Or Treat Bag, Bitch Please Pun Halloween Tote, Witches, Hag

#witchplease Tote

£26.50

Hit the beach or the shops with our range of fun canvas tote bags. SIZE: 14" x 18.5"

£26.50
And Then There Was No Sleep Cushion | Deadpan New Baby Cushion, Funny Gift For New Parents, Monochrome, Nursery

And Then There Was No Sleep Cushion

£25.25

Brighten your home with our range of stuffed cushions. SIZE: 16" X 16"

£25.25
Hi I'm Vegan Apron | Deadpan Present For Vegan, Monochrome Vegan Apron, Veggie, Plant Based

Hi I'm Vegan Apron

£21.50

Tell them like it is with our range of canvas aprons.  SIZE: 25" X 35" 

£21.50
I'll Give You A Good Stuffing Apron | Funny, Deadpan Christmas Apron For Him, Stuffing Sex Joke

I'll Give You A Good Stuffing Apron

£21.50

Tell them like it is with our range of canvas aprons.  SIZE: 25" X 35" 

£21.50
You Really Are A Massive Cunt Sticker | Rude Sticker, Funny Sticker, Black And White Sticker, Offensive, Profanity

You Really Are A Massive Cunt Sticker

£3.65

Tell them like it is with these fun stickers.  SIZE: 3x4"

£3.65
Please Pass On Our Deepest Sympathies To Your New Neighbours Coaster | Gift For Couples Moving Out, Monochrome Drinks Mat, Housewarming, New Home

Please Pass On Our Deepest Sympathies To Your New Neighbours Coaster

£13.25

Tell them like it is with these fun coasters. SIZE: 4x4"

£13.25
Mum Thanks For Giving Me Small Tits Fridge Magnet | Funny Gifts For Mum, Thank You Gift For Mother, Mother's Day Gift, Small Boobs, Breasts

Mum Thanks For Giving Me Small Tits Magnet

£10.95

Tell them like it is with our fun magnets. SIZE: 4 x 4" square

£10.95
Get Well Soon Skiver Greeting Card | Funny Sympathy Card, Accident Card, Rude Get Well Soon Card

Get Well Soon Skiver Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards.

from £3.99
Thanks For Nothing Greeting Card | Deadpan Thank You Card, Rude Thank You Card, Funny Thank You Card

Thanks For Nothing Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Now We're Even Greeting Card | Funny Thank You Card, Deadpan Thanks Card, Cheers, Gratitude, Monochrome

Now We're Even Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards.

from £3.99
One Person Can Change Your Life I'm Still Waiting For That Person Greeting Card | Deadpan Anniversary Card, Funny Valentines Card, Love, Monochrome

One Person Can Change Your Life I'm Still Waiting For That Person Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
We Deserve Each Other Greeting Card | Deadpan Anniversary Card, Funny Valentines Card, Love, Monochrome, For Him, For Her

We Deserve Each Other Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
An Important Event Took Place On This Day In A Previous Year Greeting Card | Deadpan Birthday Card, Dry Humour Anniversary Card, Monochrome

An Important Event Took Place On This Day In A Previous Year Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards.

from £3.99
Obligatory Father's Day Card Greeting Card | Deadpan Father's Day Card, Dry Humour Card For Dad

Obligatory Father's Day Card Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Bitches Get Stitches Greeting Card | Funny New Mum Card, Joke New Mum Card, New Baby, Just Gave Birth

Bitches Get Stitches Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Hi I'm Vegan Greeting Card | Deadpan Greeting Card, Vegan Greeting Card, Greeting Card For Vegans, Funny Vegan Card, Veggie, Plant Based

Hi I'm Vegan Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Good Luck You Fuck A5 Notebook | Funny Leaving Gift, Funny Good Luck Gift, Rude Journal, Black and White Notebook, New Job, Off To University

Good Luck You Fuck A5 Notebook

£11.25

Tell them like it is with these fun notebooks.

£11.25
Congratulations You Undeserving Dickhead Coaster | Congratulations Gift, Graduation, Rude Drinks Mat, Black and White, Well Done, New Job, Promotion

Congratulations You Undeserving Dickhead Coaster

£13.25

Tell them like it is with these fun coasters. SIZE: 4x4"

£13.25
Congratulations You Smug Wanker Coaster | CCongratulations Gift, Graduation Gift, Rude Drinks Mat, Black and White, Well Done, New Job, Promotion

Congratulations You Smug Wanker Coaster

£13.25

Tell them like it is with these fun coasters. SIZE: 4x4"

£13.25
Good Luck And Good Riddance Magnet | Funny Leaving Gift, Funny Good Luck Gift, Rude Fridge Magnet, Black and White, New Job, Leaving For University

Good Luck And Good Riddance Magnet

£10.95

Tell them like it is with our fun magnets. SIZE: 4 x 4" square

£10.95
If I Were Wrong Don't You Think I'd Know Mug | Funny, Deadpan Mug For Coworker, Husband, Wife, Boyfriend, Girlfriend, Always Right, Never Wrong

If I Were Wrong Don't You Think I'd Know Mug

£11.95

Tell them like it is with our fun range of mugs.

£11.95
I'm Not Argumentative... I'm Not Mug | Funny, Deadpan Mug For Coworker, Husband, Wife, Boyfriend, Girlfriend, Argumentative Person, Contrary

I'm Not Argumentative... I'm Not Mug

£11.95

Tell them like it is with our fun range of mugs.

£11.95
In Dog Years You Are A Ghost Greeting Card | Deadpan, Dry Humour, Rude You're Old Birthday Card For Mum, Dad, Grandparent, Old Age Joke

In Dog Years You Are A Ghost Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
I Am 42 Mug | 40 + 2, Funny, Deadpan 42nd Birthday Gift For Friend, Brother, Sister, Forty Second Birthday, 2 Fingers Up, Fuck Off, Forty Two

I Am 42 Mug

£11.95

Tell them like it is with our fun range of mugs.

£11.95
I Am 40 Mug | 38 + 2, Funny, Deadpan 40th Birthday Gift For Friend, Brother, Sister, Fortieth Birthday Gift, 2 Fingers Up, Fuck Off, Forty

I Am 40 Mug

£11.95

Tell them like it is with our fun range of mugs.

£11.95

We challenge you to gift these items without cracking a smile. Lemon Loco offers a wide range of deadpan gifts, ranging from Mugs, Coasters, Magnets, Stickers, Notebooks, Cushions, Journals, Towels, Tote Bags & Aprons.

We also offer a collection of premium deadpan greeting cards which can be personalised and sent direct at no extra cost. Browse now to find your perfect gift today!