Deadpan Gifts

We challenge you to gift these items without cracking a smile. Lemon Loco offers a wide range of deadpan gifts, ranging from Mugs, Coasters, Magnets, Stickers, Notebooks, Cushions, Journals, Towels, Tote Bags & Aprons.

We also offer a collection of premium deadpan greeting cards which can be personalised and sent direct at no extra cost. Browse now to find your perfect gift today!

Allotment Wanker A5 Notebook | Rude, Funny Gift For Gardener, Allotment Owner, Garden Journal, Diary, Gardening Tools, Veggies, Plants

Allotment Wanker A5 Notebook

£11.25

Tell them like it is with these fun notebooks.

£11.25
Gym Wanker A5 Notebook | Rude, Funny Gift For Gym Goer, Weight Lifter, Gym Enthusiast, Muscle Head, Gains, Journal, Dairy

Gym Wanker A5 Notebook

£11.25

Tell them like it is with these fun notebooks.

£11.25
You Really Are A Massive Cunt A5 Notebook | Rude Notebook, Offensive Journal, Black And White Notebook, Funny Gift, Profanity

You Really Are A Massive Cunt A5 Notebook

£11.25

Tell them like it is with these fun notebooks.

£11.25
Guitar Wanker A5 Notebook | Rude, Funny Gift For Guitarist, Guitar Player, Musician, Music Lover, Journal, Diary

Guitar Wanker A5 Notebook

£11.25

Tell them like it is with these fun notebooks.

£11.25
Carole Fuckin' Baskin A5 Notebook | Tiger King Gifts, Carole Baskin, Joe Exotic, Monochrome, Black And White Journal

Carole Fuckin' Baskin A5 Notebook

£11.25

Tell them like it is with these fun notebooks.

£11.25
Bike Wanker A5 Notebook | Rude, Funny Gift For Cyclist, Biker, Cycling Journal, Biking Diary

Bike Wanker A5 Notebook

£11.25

Tell them like it is with these fun notebooks.

£11.25
Drum Wanker A5 Notebook | Rude, Funny Gift For Drummer, Drum Player, Musician, Music Lover, Journal, Diary

Drum Wanker A5 Notebook

£11.25

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£11.25
Caravan Wanker A5 Notebook | Rude, Funny Gift For Caravaner, Caravan Owner, Staycation Journal, Diary, Caravan Doodle

Caravan Wanker A5 Notebook

£11.25

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£11.25
Please Pass On Our Deepest Sympathies To Your New Neighbours A5 Notebook | Moving Out Gift, Gifts For Couples Moving Out, Black And White Journal

Please Pass On Our Deepest Sympathies To Your New Neighbours A5 Notebook

£11.25

Tell them like it is with these fun notebooks.

£11.25
Good Luck You Fuck A5 Notebook | Funny Leaving Gift, Funny Good Luck Gift, Rude Journal, Black and White Notebook, New Job, Off To University

Good Luck You Fuck A5 Notebook

£11.25

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£11.25
Violin Wanker A5 Notebook | Rude, Funny Gift For Violinist, Violin Player, Musician, Music Lover, Journal, Diary

Violin Wanker A5 Notebook

£11.25

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£11.25
Running Wanker A5 Notebook | Rude, Funny Gift For Runner, Marathon Journal, Diary, 5k, Jogger, Jogging

Running Wanker A5 Notebook

£11.25

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£11.25
Keep The Fuck Away A5 Notebook | Funny Offensive Gifts For Friends, Monochrome, Profanity, Stay Away, Get Well Soon

Keep The Fuck Away A5 Notebook

£11.25

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£11.25
Mum Thanks For Giving Me Small Tits A5 Notebook | Funny Gifts For Mum, Mother's Day Gift, Thank You Gift For Mother

Mum Thanks For Giving Me Small Tits A5 Notebook

£11.25

Tell them like it is with these fun notebooks.

£11.25
There Is No Place Like Your Vagina A5 Notebook | Funny, Rude Notebook, Anniversary Gift For Her, Valentines, Black And White Journal

There Is No Place Like Your Vagina A5 Notebook

£11.25

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£11.25
Good Luck And Good Riddance A5 Notebook | Funny Leaving Gift, Good Luck, Rude Journal, Black and White, New Job, New Home, Off To University

Good Luck And Good Riddance A5 Notebook

£11.25

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£11.25
Congratulations You Undeserving Dickhead A5 Notebook | Congratulations Gift, Graduation Gift, Rude Journal, Black and White Notebook, New Job, Well Done

Congratulations You Undeserving Dickhead A5 Notebook

£11.25

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£11.25
Congratulations You Cunt A5 Notebook | Congratulations Gift, Graduation Gift, Rude Journal, Black and White Notebook, New Job, Well Done

Congratulations You Cunt A5 Notebook

£11.25

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£11.25
Hi I'm Vegan A5 Notebook | Gifts For Vegans, Journal For Vegan Recipes, Veggie, Plant Based, Vegan Humour

Hi I'm Vegan A5 Notebook

£11.25

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£11.25
And They Lived In Eternal Regret And Misery A5 Notebook | Funny Wedding Gift, Engagement Notebook, Wedding Journal, Pessimistic, Sarcastic Wedding Gift

And They Lived In Eternal Regret And Misery A5 Notebook

£11.25

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£11.25
Dad Thanks For Giving Me A Small Cock A5 Notebook | Father's Day Gift, Thank You Gift For Dad, Monochrome Journal, Small Todger, Willy, Penis

Dad Thanks For Giving Me A Small Cock A5 Notebook

£11.25

Wow them with your willy vocab with these fun notebooks.

£11.25