Profanity Themed Greeting Cards

We offer a wide range of profanity themed greeting cards that are guaranteed to make them smile!

Our cards cover a wide range of holidays and occasions - Christmas, Birthday, Congratulations, New Baby, Thank You, Sympathy & Grievance, Wedding, Leaving - and can be personalised and sent direct at no extra charge!

Your Best Chance Of Getting Laid Is To Crawl Up A Chicken's Ass And Wait Greeting Card | Deadpan Greeting Card, Can't Get Laid, Not Getting Any Sex

Your Best Chance Of Getting Laid Is To Crawl Up A Chicken's Ass And Wait Greeting Card

from £3.99

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from £3.99
I'm No Cactus Expert But I Know A Prick When I See One Greeting Card | Rude, Offensive, Deadpan Cactus Pun Greeting Card, You're A Prick Cactus Card

I'm No Cactus Expert But I Know A Prick When I See One Greeting Card

from £3.99

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from £3.99
I Would Tell You To Eat Shit But I Know You're Not Into Cannibalism Greeting Card | Rude, Offensive, Profanity, Deadpan Greeting Card, You're Shit

I Would Tell You To Eat Shit But I Know You're Not Into Cannibalism Greeting Card

from £3.99

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from £3.99
Violin Wanker Greeting Card | Rude, Funny Card For Violinist, Violin Player, Musician, Music Lover

Violin Wanker Greeting Card

from £3.99

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from £3.99
Husband Acronym Greeting Card | Funny, Offensive Anniversary Card For Husband, Hard Work, Uncouth, Sassy, Brash, Annoying, Nauseating, Disappointing

Husband Acronym Greeting Card

from £3.99

Put a smile on their face with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Well This Is A Fucking Shit Birthday Greeting Card | Deadpan Lockdown Birthday Card, Crap Birthday, Can't Celebrate, Monochrome, Profanity

Well This Is A Fucking Shit Birthday Greeting Card

from £3.99

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from £3.99
I Like Big Mutts And I Cannot Lie! Greeting Card | Funny Dog Pun Card For Dog Lover, I Like Big Butts And I Cannot Lie, Massive Dog Looking Confused

I Like Big Mutts And I Cannot Lie! Greeting Card

from £3.99

Put a smile on their face with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
It's Time To Get Your Cock Out... Happy Anniversary! Greeting Card | Cockeral Pun Anniversary Card For Boyfriend, Husband, Innuendo, Embarrassed Cockeral

It's Time To Get Your Cock Out... Happy Anniversary! Greeting Card

from £3.99

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from £3.99
Happy Birthday To My Favourite Cock Greeting Card | Funny Cockerel Pun Birthday Card, Smug Looking Cockerel, Rude Birthday Card For Him

Happy Birthday To My Favourite Cock Greeting Card

from £3.99

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from £3.99
I'm Getting Hitched And I Need My Bitch! Be My Maid Of Honour? Greeting Card | Funny Rhyming Be My Maid Of Honour Card, Best Friend, Bridal Party Card

I'm Getting Hitched And I Need My Bitch! Be My Maid Of Honour? Greeting Card

from £3.99

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from £3.99
Having Small Boobs Doesn't Mean You Can Overcompensate By Being A Massive Tit! Greeting Card | Deadpan, Funny Card For Her, Small Breasts Joke

Having Small Boobs Doesn't Mean You Can Overcompensate By Being A Massive Tit! Greeting Card

from £3.99

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from £3.99
Birthdays Are All About Getting Shit Faced! Greeting Card | Let's Get Drunk Birthday Card, Turned Up, Turnt, Funny Birthday Card, Let's Party

Birthdays Are All About Getting Shit Faced! Greeting Card

from £3.99

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from £3.99
New Year's Eve Is All About Getting Fucked Up! Greeting Card | Let's Get Drunk New Years Card, Turned Up, Happy New Years

New Year's Eve Is All About Getting Fucked Up! Greeting Card

from £3.99

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from £3.99
Congratulations! You Undeserving Prick! Greeting Card | Funny, Bitter Rosette Congratulations Card, Graduation, Promotion, New Job

Congratulations! You Undeserving Prick! Greeting Card

from £3.99

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from £3.99
Queen Bee Greeting Card | Funny, Bee Pun Card For Friend, Bee In Crown With Sceptre, Royal Highness, Yass Queen, LGBTQ+

Queen Bee Greeting Card

from £3.99

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from £3.99
Your Knob Still Does The Job Happy Valentine's Greeting Card | Funny, Deadpan Valentine's Card For Husband, Boyfriend, Penis Still Works, Dick Joke

Your Knob Still Does The Job Happy Valentine's Greeting Card

from £3.99

Put a smile on their face with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Have A Fucking Spectacular Divorce Greeting Card | Deadpan Divorce Card, Dry Humour Break-Up Card, Monochrome, Sympathy

Have A Fucking Spectacular Divorce Greeting Card

from £3.99

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from £3.99
Let Us Fuck Greeting Card | Funny, Deadpan Anniversary Card For Boyfriend, Girlfriend, Let's Have Sex, Profanity, Blunt

Let Us Fuck Greeting Card

from £3.99

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from £3.99
I Wanted To Get You Something Deep And Meaningful, Then I Remembered I Couldn't Give A Fuck Greeting Card | Profanity Greeting Card, Birthday, Anniversary
from £3.99
You Fucking Mug Greeting Card | Funny Sympathy Card, Sorry Card, Lost Job, Break Up, Gullible, Divorce, Slang, Sucker, Fool

You Fucking Mug Greeting Card

from £3.99

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from £3.99
You Don't Half Talk Some Bullshit Greeting Card | Deadpan Greeting Card, Profanity Card, Chat Shit, Compulsive Lier, Chatting Shit

You Don't Half Talk Some Bullshit Greeting Card

from £3.99

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from £3.99
Congratulations On Your New Home I Know You Worked Hard Crawling Out Of Your Wealthy Mother's Vagina Greeting Card | Rude New Home Card, Spoilt, Rich
from £3.99
Your Knob Still Does The Job Happy Anniversary Greeting Card | Funny, Deadpan Anniversary Card For Husband, Boyfriend, Penis Still Works, Dick Joke

Your Knob Still Does The Job Happy Anniversary Greeting Card

from £3.99

Put a smile on their face with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Nope, Still A Wanker! Greeting Card | Rude, Offensive, Deadpan Card For Friend, Brother, Sister, Sibling, Wanker, Monochrome

Nope, Still A Wanker! Greeting Card

from £3.99

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from £3.99
Happy Birthday! Christ You're A Fucking Fine Specimen! Happy Birthday! Greeting Card | Funny Rosette Birthday Card For Boyfriend, For Girlfriend

Happy Birthday! Christ You're A Fucking Fine Specimen! Greeting Card

from £3.99

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from £3.99
It's Your Birthday Let's Get Shih-Tzu Faced Greeting Card | Funny, Cute, Shih-Tzu Pun Birthday Card For Friend, Drunk Shih-Tzu, Let's Get Shitfaced

It's Your Birthday Let's Get Shih-Tzu Faced Greeting Card

from £3.99

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from £3.99
Happy Mother's Day You Gin-dependent Woman Greeting Card | Funny Mother's Day Card For Mum, Sassy Confident Gin Bottle, Independent Woman, Gin Pun

Happy Mother's Day You Gin-dependent Woman Greeting Card

from £3.99

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from £3.99
You Ass Clucker! Greeting Card | Funny, Mean, Rude Chicken Donkey Pun Card, Ass Fucker, Chicken Sat On A Donkey, Cluck

You Ass Clucker! Greeting Card

from £3.99

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from £3.99
Happy Valentine's To My Favourite Prick Greeting Card | Rude, Funny Valentine's Card, For Him, For Her, Cactus Doodle, Cacti

Happy Valentine's To My Favourite Prick Greeting Card

from £3.99

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from £3.99
It's Time To Stop Lion Around... And Celebrate!!! Greeting Card | Funny Lion Pun Celebration Card, Lion Lying Down With A Glass Of Champagne

It's Time To Stop Lion Around... And Celebrate!!! Greeting Card

from £3.99

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from £3.99
I'm Glad You Finally Got Your Ass Out Of Here Greeting Card | Donkey Pun You're Leaving Card, Going Away Travelling, Good Bye, Man Leading Donkey Away

I'm Glad You Finally Got Your Ass Out Of Here Greeting Card

from £3.99

Brighten their day with our range of fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Chit Happens Greeting Card | Stressed Looking Yogi Meditating Card, For Yogi, Yoga Lover, Namaste, Shit Happens, Breakup, Zen, Forgiveness, Healing

Chit Happens Greeting Card

from £3.99

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from £3.99
You Know I'm All About The Bass Greeting Card | Funny Fish Pun Card, Group Of Bass, All About That Bass, All About The Music, Music Fish Joke

You Know I'm All About The Bass Greeting Card

from £3.99

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from £3.99
It's Your Birthday... Let's Get Clucked Up! Greeting Card | Funny Chicken Pun Birthday Card, Chicken Rolling On Alcohol Bottle, Let's Get Fucked Up

It's Your Birthday... Let's Get Clucked Up! Greeting Card

from £3.99

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from £3.99
They Said He Only Did Once A Year, But When He Did, It Was Always A Sackfull. Greeting Card | Rude Vintage Christmas Card, Santa Claus Presents Joke

They Said He Only Did Once A Year, But When He Did, It Was Always A Sackfull. Greeting Card

from £3.99

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from £3.99
Jack Was Embarrassed About His Tiddler. Greeting Card | Funny Vintage Joke Card For Him, Man and Woman With Small Fish On A Plate, Small Penis Joke,

Jack Was Embarrassed About His Tiddler. Greeting Card

from £3.99

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from £3.99

"Get A Bucket And A Mop For This WAP" She Whispered. Greeting Card

from £3.99

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from £3.99
Emma Wondered If Now Was The Time To Tell Pete He Looked Fucking Ridiculous. Greeting Card | Funny Anniversary, Vintage, Fairies Kissing On Toadstool, Pixies

Emma Wondered If Now Was The Time To Tell Pete He Looked Fucking Ridiculous. Greeting Card

from £3.99

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from £3.99

"Harold, Fuck Off, Your Breath Smells Like Wet Eggs." Greeting Card

from £3.99

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from £3.99
Sit! And Paw Yourself A Drink It's Your Birthday! Greeting Card | Funny, Cute, Dog Pun Birthday Card, Sausage Dog In A Party Hat With Cocktail

Sit! And Paw Yourself A Drink It's Your Birthday! Greeting Card

from £3.99

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from £3.99
Unwind On Your Birthday Happy Birthday Greeting Card | Funny, Cute, Cassette Tape Pun Birthday Card, Cassette Tape Undwinding

Unwind On Your Birthday Greeting Card

from £3.99

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from £3.99
Here's To Another Year Of Pointless, Vapid Existence! Happy New Year! Greeting Card | Pessimistic New Years, Champagne Glasses Clinking, Bubbly

Here's To Another Year Of Pointless, Vapid Existence! Happy New Year! Greeting Card

from £3.99

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from £3.99
Happy New Home - Well Deserved, I Know You Worked Hard On Crawling Out Of Your Wealthy Mother's Vagina! Greeting Card | Rich, Spoilt, Moving Out
from £3.99
Sending Good Vibes This Christmas Greeting Card | Funny Sex Toy Pun Christmas Card For Friend, Rude Dildo, Vibrater Doodle

Sending Good Vibes This Christmas Greeting Card

from £3.99

Put a smile on their face with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Jingle Bell... End. Christmas Greeting Card | Rude, Funny Christmas Carol Pun Card, Jingle Bells, Bellend, Profanity

Jingle Bell... End. Greeting Card

from £3.99

Put a smile on their face with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Let That Shit Go. Greeting Card | Funny Yoga Sympathy Card In Green, Profanity, Let It Go, Breakup, Zen, Forgiveness, Healing

Let That Shit Go. Greeting Card

from £3.99

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from £3.99
Sumo Wrestler Well Done Greeting Card | Sumo Wrestler Congratulations Card, Exams, Graduation, Passed Driving Test, New Job

Sumo Wrestler Well Done Greeting Card

from £3.99

Brighten their day with our range of hand illustrated greeting cards.

from £3.99
45 And Still A Prick Greeting Card | Offensive, Rude Forty Fifth Birthday Card For Forty Five Year Old, 45th, Cactus Doodle Prick Pun, Cacti

45 And Still A Prick Greeting Card

from £3.99

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from £3.99