Deadpan Greeting Cards

Happy Birthday From The Best Decision You Ever Made Greeting Card | Deadpan, Dry Humour Birthday Card For Parent, Husband, Wife, Girlfriend, Boyfriend

Happy Birthday From The Best Decision You Ever Made Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards.

from £3.99
I Regret To Inform You That Your Twenties Have Now Expired Greeting Card | Deadpan, Dry Humour Thirtieth Birthday Card or Thirty Year Old, 30th, 30

I Regret To Inform You That Your Twenties Have Now Expired Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Happy Birthday Womb Mate Greeting Card | Birthday Card For Twin, Funny Twin Birthday Card, Sibling

Happy Birthday Womb Mate Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Happy Birthday Cunty McCunt Face Greeting Card | Deadpan, Profanity Birthday Card For Friend, Swear Word Card

Happy Birthday Cunty McCunt Face Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Happy Birthday Womb Mate. Greeting Card | Funny Birthday Card In Pink For Twin, Sibling, Sister

Happy Birthday Womb Mate. Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
I Regret To Inform You That Your Thirties Have Now Expired Greeting Card | Deadpan, Dry Humour Fortieth Birthday Card or Forty Year Old, 40th, 40

I Regret To Inform You That Your Thirties Have Now Expired Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Happy Birthday From The Best Decision You Ever Made. Greeting Card | Deadpan, Dry Humour Birthday Card In Orange For Parent, Husband Or Wife

Happy Birthday From The Best Decision You Ever Made. Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards.

from £3.99
Happy Birthday Womb Mate. Greeting Card | Funny Birthday Card In Blue For Twin, Sibling, Brother

Happy Birthday Womb Mate. Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Happy Birthday From One Cunt To Another Greeting Card | Deadpan, Profanity Birthday Card For Friend, Swear Word Card

Happy Birthday From One Cunt To Another Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
I Regret To Inform You That Your Fifties Have Now Expired Greeting Card | Deadpan, Dry Humour Sixtieth Birthday Card or Sixty Year Old, 60th, 60

I Regret To Inform You That Your Fifties Have Now Expired Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
RIP To Your Twenties Greeting Card | Deadpan, Dry Humour Thirtieth Birthday Card For Son, Daughter, Brother, Sister, Friend, Thirty Year Old, 30th

RIP To Your Twenties Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Happy Birthday You Ginger Cunt. Greeting Card | Deadpan, Profanity, Rude Birthday Card In Orange For Ginger, Red Head

Happy Birthday You Ginger Cunt. Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards.

from £3.99
You're Dead In Dog Years Greeting Card | Deadpan, Dry Humour, Rude Birthday Card For Mum, Dad, Grandparent, Old Age Joke

You're Dead In Dog Years Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
I Regret To Inform You That Your Forties Have Now Expired Greeting Card |  Deadpan, Dry Humour Fiftieth Birthday Card or Fifty Year Old, 50th, 50

I Regret To Inform You That Your Forties Have Now Expired Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Fuck You're Old Greeting Card | Offensive Birthday Card, Profanity, Old Age Joke Birthday Card

Fuck You're Old Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
On This Day You Came Out A Vagina Tonight You'll Be Back Inside One | Funny Birthday Card For Him, Rude Sex Joke Birthday Card For Him,

On This Day You Came Out A Vagina Tonight You'll Be Back Inside One Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
You Make Me Wet Greeting Card | Funny Anniversary Card For Him, Rude Love Card, Valentines Card For Boyfriend, Husband

You Make Me Wet Greeting Card

from £3.99

Put a smile on their face with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Obligatory Birthday Card. Greeting Card | Deadpan, Rude, Funny Happy Birthday Card For Friend, Family

Obligatory Birthday Card. Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Obligatory Birthday Card Greeting Card | Deadpan Birthday Card, Dry Humour Birthday Card

Obligatory Birthday Card Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Happy Birthday Cunt Greeting Card | Funny Insult Birthday Card For Friend, Sibling, Boyfriend Or Girlfriend, Deadpan Profanity Birthday Card

Happy Birthday Cunt Greeting Card

from £3.99

Put a smile on their face with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
I Acknowledge That You Are One Year Older Greeting Card | Deadpan Birthday Card, Dry Humour Birthday Card

I Acknowledge That You Are One Year Older Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Fuck It. This Card Will Do. Greeting Card | Funny Birthday Card For Friend, Her, Him, Family, Deadpan Can't Be Bothered Birthday Card, Lazy Card Joke

Fuck It. This Card Will Do. Greeting Card

from £3.99

Put a smile on their face with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Happy Birthday You Bellend Greeting Card | Funny, Deadpan Profanity Insult Birthday Card For Friend, Brother, Sister, Bell With Party Hat On

Happy Birthday You Bellend Greeting Card

from £3.99

Put a smile on their face with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Happy Birthday P.S Please Stop Snoring Greeting Card | Deadpan, Dry Humour Birthday Card For Partner, Girlfriend, Boyfriend, Wife, Husband

Happy Birthday P.S Please Stop Snoring Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards.

from £3.99
Happy Birthday From The One Who Puts Up With Your Farts Greeting Card | Deadpan Birthday Card For Partner, Husband, Wife, Girlfriend Or Boyfriend

Happy Birthday From The One Who Puts Up With Your Farts Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
This Is Literally The First Card I Saw Greeting Card | Deadpan Greeting Card, Minimal, Low Effort Card, Birthday, Anniversary, Congratulations

This Is Literally The First Card I Saw Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Wishing You A Happy Birthday From A Social Distance Greeting Card | Deadpan Birthday Card, Dry Humour Birthday Card, Socially Distanced Birthday

Wishing You A Happy Birthday From A Social Distance Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
I Love You More Than Connell's Chain Greeting Card | Funny Birthday Card For Him, Funny Normal People Card, Anniversary Card For Boyfriend, Husband

I Love You More Than Connell's Chain Greeting Card

from £3.99

Put a smile on their face with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
If Cousins Were Bogies I'd Pick You Greeting Card | Deadpan Birthday Card For Cousin, Nose Picking Joke, I Choose You, Love You Cousin Card

If Cousins Were Bogies I'd Pick You Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
If Mums Were Bogies I'd Pick You Greeting Card | Deadpan Mother's Day Card For Mum, Birthday Card For Mum, Nose Picking Joke, I Choose You

If Mums Were Bogies I'd Pick You Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
One Year Closer To Death Greeting Card | Funny, Deadpan You're Old Age Joke Birthday Card For Mum, Dad, Friend, Grandad, Grandma, Another Year Older

One Year Closer To Death Greeting Card

from £3.99

Put a smile on their face with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
If Sisters Were Bogies I'd Pick You Greeting Card | Deadpan Birthday Card For Sibling, Nose Picking Joke, I Choose You, Love You Sister Card

If Sisters Were Bogies I'd Pick You Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
I'm Starting To Realise That Looking Up To You Might Have Been A Mistake... Happy Birthday Dad! Greeting Card | Deadpan Birthday Card For Father
from £3.99
Happy Birthday! You Are A Constant Source Of Disappointment! Greeting Card | Deadpan Birthday Card For Son, Daughter, Spouse, Birthday Candle

Happy Birthday! You Are A Constant Source Of Disappointment! Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Happy Birthday To My Favourite Bisexual Greeting Card | Deadpan, LGBTQ+ Birthday Card For Friend

Happy Birthday To My Favourite Bisexual Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Happy Birthday I Couldn't Afford A Card With A Picture Greeting Card | Deadpan, Dry Humour, Birthday Card For Friend, Mum, Dad, Brother, Sister

Happy Birthday I Couldn't Afford A Card With A Picture Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Happy Birthday You Nosey Cunt Greeting Card | Deadpan, Profanity Birthday Card For Friend, Nosey Cunt In Small Font Joke

Happy Birthday You Nosey Cunt Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards.

from £3.99
I Couldn't Give A Shit About Your Birthday Greeting Card | Rude Birthday Card, Offensive Birthday Card, Profanity

I Couldn't Give A Shit About Your Birthday Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
I Regret To Inform You That You Are No Longer Young Greeting Card | Deadpan Birthday Card, Dry Humour Birthday Card, Old Age Joke

I Regret To Inform You That You Are No Longer Young Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Today Is The Anniversary Of The Day You Were Born Greeting Card | Deadpan Birthday Card, Dry Humour, To The Point Birthday Card

Today Is The Anniversary Of The Day You Were Born Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
U Are 42 Greeting Card | 40 + 2, Funny, Deadpan 42nd Birthday Card For Friend, Sibling, Forty Second Birthday, 2 Fingers Up, Fuck Off, Forty Two

U Are 42 Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
U Are 22 Greeting Card | 20 + 2, Funny, Deadpan 22nd Birthday Card For Friend, Son, Daughter, Sibling Twenty Second, 2 Fingers Up, Fuck Off, Twenty Second

U Are 22 Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Happy Birthday Dickhead Greeting Card | Funny, Deadpan Profanity Insult Birthday Card For Friend, Brother, Sister, Colourful Bubble Writing

Happy Birthday Dickhead Greeting Card

from £3.99

Put a smile on their face with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Happy Birthday You Dick Greeting Card | Funny Insult Birthday Card For Friend, Sibling, Boyfriend Or Girlfriend, Deadpan Profanity Birthday Card

Happy Birthday You Dick Greeting Card

from £3.99

Put a smile on their face with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
I Asked Alexa How Old You Are. She Laughed Greeting Card | Deadpan Alexa Joke Birthday Card For Mum Or Dad, Age Joke, Getting Older, Funny, You're Old

I Asked Alexa How Old You Are. She Laughed Greeting Card

from £3.99

Put a smile on their face with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Nothing Says Happy Birthday Like A Folded Piece Of Card Greeting Card | Funny Birthday Card For Friend, Her, Him, Family, Deadpan Birthday Card

Nothing Says Happy Birthday Like A Folded Piece Of Card Greeting Card

from £3.99

Put a smile on their face with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
You're Old Enough To Remember When Emojis Were Called Hieroglyphics Greeting Card | Old Age Joke, Deadpan Birthday Card, You're Old Birthday Card

You're Old Enough To Remember When Emojis Were Called Hieroglyphics Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
If Brothers Were Bogies I'd Pick You Greeting Card | Deadpan Birthday Card For Sibling, Nose Picking Joke, I Choose You, Love You Brother Card

If Brothers Were Bogies I'd Pick You Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99

Challenge them to open these premium greeting cards without cracking a smile!

All of our cards are printed on thick 324gsm paper and can be personalised with an internal message and send direct.

Our cards cover a wide range of occasions - Christmas, Birthday, Congratulations, New Baby, Thank You, Sympathy & Grievance, Wedding, Leaving, Christmas, Mother and Father's Day and much more!