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Deadpan Gifts

We challenge you to gift these items without cracking a smile. Lemon Loco offers a wide range of deadpan gifts, ranging from Mugs, Coasters, Magnets, Stickers, Notebooks, Cushions, Journals, Towels, Tote Bags & Aprons.

We also offer a collection of premium deadpan greeting cards which can be personalised and sent direct at no extra cost. Browse now to find your perfect gift today!

You Really Are A Massive Cunt A5 Notebook | Rude Notebook, Offensive Journal, Black And White Notebook, Funny Gift, Profanity

You Really Are A Massive Cunt A5 Notebook

£11.25

Tell them like it is with these fun notebooks.

£11.25
Thought You'd Never Leave Greeting Card | Deadpan You're Leaving Card, Funny Retirement Card, Funny New Job Card For Coworker, Child Moving Out Card

Thought You'd Never Leave Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
I Acknowledge That You Are One Year Older Greeting Card | Deadpan Birthday Card, Dry Humour Birthday Card

I Acknowledge That You Are One Year Older Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Happy Birthday You Bellend Greeting Card | Funny, Deadpan Profanity Insult Birthday Card For Friend, Brother, Sister, Bell With Party Hat On

Happy Birthday You Bellend Greeting Card

from £3.99

Put a smile on their face with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Of All The Weirdos On Tinder You're My Favourite Greeting Card | Funny, Deadpan Anniversary Card For Boyfriend, Girlfriend, Met On Tinder, Dating App

Of All The Weirdos On Tinder You're My Favourite Greeting Card

from £3.99

Put a smile on their face with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Congratulations You Made The Christmas Card List Greeting Card | Funny, Sarcastic, Deadpan Christmas Card For Friends, Family

Congratulations You Made The Christmas Card List Greeting Card

from £3.99

Put a smile on their face with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Christmas Is Cancelled. Greeting Card | Funny, Deadpan Christmas Card For Friend, Christmas Hater, Bah Humbug

Christmas Is Cancelled. Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
I Know Where You Live. Greeting Card | Deadpan, Funny New Home Card, You're Leaving, Moving Out, Housewarming

I Know Where You Live. Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
You Really Are A Massive Cunt Mug | Rude, Offensive, Profanity Gift For Coworker, Friend, Sibling

You Really Are A Massive Cunt Mug

£11.95

Tell them like it is with our fun range of mugs.

£11.95
Guitar Wanker A5 Notebook | Rude, Funny Gift For Guitarist, Guitar Player, Musician, Music Lover, Journal, Diary

Guitar Wanker A5 Notebook

£11.25

Tell them like it is with these fun notebooks.

£11.25
May I Suggest The Sausage Apron | Rude, Funny Pun BBQ Apron For Him, Inuendo, Monochrome

May I Suggest The Sausage Apron

£21.50

Tell them like it is with our range of canvas aprons.  SIZE: 25" X 35" 

£21.50
You're The Dog's Bollocks Greeting Card | Rude Graduation Card, Rude Well Done Card, Rude New Job Card

You're The Dog's Bollocks Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards.

from £3.99
Today Should Be Your Wedding Day But It's Not Greeting Card | Cancelled Wedding Card, Rescheduled Wedding Card

Today Should Be Your Wedding Day But It's Not Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Bugger Greeting Card | Funny Sympathy Card, Accident Card, Sorry Card, Lost Job, Failed Exam, Failed Driving Test, Break Up

Bugger Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards.

from £3.99
Carole Fuckin' Baskin A5 Notebook | Tiger King Gifts, Carole Baskin, Joe Exotic, Monochrome, Black And White Journal

Carole Fuckin' Baskin A5 Notebook

£11.25

Tell them like it is with these fun notebooks.

£11.25
I Am 31 Mug | 29 + 2, Funny, Deadpan 31st Birthday Gift For Friend, Son, Daughter, Sibling, Thirty First Birthday, 2 Fingers Up, Fuck Off, Thirty One

I Am 31 Mug

£11.95

Tell them like it is with our fun range of mugs.

£11.95
Happy Poo In Your New Loo! Greeting Card | Deadpan, Funny Toilet Joke New Home Card, You're Leaving, Moving Out, Housewarming, Toilet Doodle

Happy Poo In Your New Loo! Greeting Card

from £3.99

Put a smile on their face with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
I Can't Wait To Have A Big Poo In Your New Loo! Greeting Card | Deadpan, Funny New Home Card, You're Leaving, Moving Out, Housewarming, Toilet Doodle

I Can't Wait To Have A Big Poo In Your New Loo! Greeting Card

from £3.99

Put a smile on their face with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Happy Birthday P.S Please Stop Snoring Greeting Card | Deadpan, Dry Humour Birthday Card For Partner, Girlfriend, Boyfriend, Wife, Husband

Happy Birthday P.S Please Stop Snoring Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards.

from £3.99
Festive As Fuck. Greeting Card | Funny, Rude, Deadpan, Profanity Christmas Card In Red, Festive AF,

Festive As Fuck. Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Happy Mother's Day From Your Greatest Accomplishment. Greeting Card | Funny, Deadpan, Joke Mother's Day Card For Mum, Her

Happy Mother's Day From Your Greatest Accomplishment. Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Welcome To The World Tiny Human Greeting Card | Funny New Baby Card, Joke New Baby Card, Monochrome, Just Born

Welcome To The World Tiny Human Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Sorry I'm Washing My Hair Greeting Card | Funny Excuse RSVP Card, Can't Make It Card, Wedding, Birthday Party

Sorry I'm Washing My Hair Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards.

from £3.99
I Love You More Than Connell's Chain Greeting Card | Funny Birthday Card For Him, Funny Normal People Card, Anniversary Card For Boyfriend, Husband

I Love You More Than Connell's Chain Greeting Card

from £3.99

Put a smile on their face with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99