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Deadpan Gifts

We challenge you to gift these items without cracking a smile. Lemon Loco offers a wide range of deadpan gifts, ranging from Mugs, Coasters, Magnets, Stickers, Notebooks, Cushions, Journals, Towels, Tote Bags & Aprons.

We also offer a collection of premium deadpan greeting cards which can be personalised and sent direct at no extra cost. Browse now to find your perfect gift today!

Happy Birthday From The Best Decision You Ever Made Greeting Card | Deadpan, Dry Humour Birthday Card For Parent, Husband, Wife, Girlfriend, Boyfriend

Happy Birthday From The Best Decision You Ever Made Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards.

from £3.99
I Regret To Inform You That Your Twenties Have Now Expired Greeting Card | Deadpan, Dry Humour Thirtieth Birthday Card or Thirty Year Old, 30th, 30

I Regret To Inform You That Your Twenties Have Now Expired Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Happy Birthday Womb Mate Greeting Card | Birthday Card For Twin, Funny Twin Birthday Card, Sibling

Happy Birthday Womb Mate Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Happy Birthday Cunty McCunt Face Greeting Card | Deadpan, Profanity Birthday Card For Friend, Swear Word Card

Happy Birthday Cunty McCunt Face Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Happy Birthday Womb Mate. Greeting Card | Funny Birthday Card In Pink For Twin, Sibling, Sister

Happy Birthday Womb Mate. Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
I Regret To Inform You That Your Thirties Have Now Expired Greeting Card | Deadpan, Dry Humour Fortieth Birthday Card or Forty Year Old, 40th, 40

I Regret To Inform You That Your Thirties Have Now Expired Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Happy Birthday From The Best Decision You Ever Made. Greeting Card | Deadpan, Dry Humour Birthday Card In Orange For Parent, Husband Or Wife

Happy Birthday From The Best Decision You Ever Made. Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards.

from £3.99
Happy Birthday Womb Mate. Greeting Card | Funny Birthday Card In Blue For Twin, Sibling, Brother

Happy Birthday Womb Mate. Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Happy Birthday From One Cunt To Another Greeting Card | Deadpan, Profanity Birthday Card For Friend, Swear Word Card

Happy Birthday From One Cunt To Another Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
I Regret To Inform You That Your Fifties Have Now Expired Greeting Card | Deadpan, Dry Humour Sixtieth Birthday Card or Sixty Year Old, 60th, 60

I Regret To Inform You That Your Fifties Have Now Expired Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
RIP To Your Twenties Greeting Card | Deadpan, Dry Humour Thirtieth Birthday Card For Son, Daughter, Brother, Sister, Friend, Thirty Year Old, 30th

RIP To Your Twenties Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Happy Birthday You Ginger Cunt. Greeting Card | Deadpan, Profanity, Rude Birthday Card In Orange For Ginger, Red Head

Happy Birthday You Ginger Cunt. Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards.

from £3.99
You're Dead In Dog Years Greeting Card | Deadpan, Dry Humour, Rude Birthday Card For Mum, Dad, Grandparent, Old Age Joke

You're Dead In Dog Years Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
I Regret To Inform You That Your Forties Have Now Expired Greeting Card | Deadpan, Dry Humour Fiftieth Birthday Card or Fifty Year Old, 50th, 50

I Regret To Inform You That Your Forties Have Now Expired Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Caravan Wanker Coaster | Rude, Funny Gift For Caravaner, Caravan Owner, Staycation, Caravan Doodle Drinks Mat

Caravan Wanker Coaster

£13.25

Tell them like it is with these fun coasters. SIZE: 4x4"

£13.25
Fuck You're Old Greeting Card | Offensive Birthday Card, Profanity, Old Age Joke Birthday Card

Fuck You're Old Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Allotment Wanker A5 Notebook | Rude, Funny Gift For Gardener, Allotment Owner, Garden Journal, Diary, Gardening Tools, Veggies, Plants

Allotment Wanker A5 Notebook

£11.25

Tell them like it is with these fun notebooks.

£11.25
On This Day You Came Out A Vagina Tonight You'll Be Back Inside One | Funny Birthday Card For Him, Rude Sex Joke Birthday Card For Him,

On This Day You Came Out A Vagina Tonight You'll Be Back Inside One Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
You Make Me Wet Greeting Card | Funny Anniversary Card For Him, Rude Love Card, Valentines Card For Boyfriend, Husband

You Make Me Wet Greeting Card

from £3.99

Put a smile on their face with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Obligatory Birthday Card. Greeting Card | Deadpan, Rude, Funny Happy Birthday Card For Friend, Family

Obligatory Birthday Card. Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Obligatory Birthday Card Greeting Card | Deadpan Birthday Card, Dry Humour Birthday Card

Obligatory Birthday Card Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Happy Birthday Cunt Greeting Card | Funny Insult Birthday Card For Friend, Sibling, Boyfriend Or Girlfriend, Deadpan Profanity Birthday Card

Happy Birthday Cunt Greeting Card

from £3.99

Put a smile on their face with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99
Gym Wanker A5 Notebook | Rude, Funny Gift For Gym Goer, Weight Lifter, Gym Enthusiast, Muscle Head, Gains, Journal, Dairy

Gym Wanker A5 Notebook

£11.25

Tell them like it is with these fun notebooks.

£11.25
I Acknowledge That You Are One Year Older Greeting Card | Deadpan Birthday Card, Dry Humour Birthday Card

I Acknowledge That You Are One Year Older Greeting Card

from £3.99

Tell them like it is with our fun greeting cards. 

from £3.99